Find Out What it Means to Me
R.E.S.P.E.C.T.
I was talking to a fellow teacher friend of mine recently and we were reflecting on the past school year. The craziness, some funny stories, and the sheer chaos of it all. We discussed teacher shortages and how disrespectful students can be. I repeated something to her that I have said to other family and friends of mine, "when I was in high school, I would not DARE talk to a teacher the way some of these kids talk to me." My friend agreed.
She, I, and many others that I know have come to a conclusion that I am sure is not new...so many of the adolescent attitudes we are seeing, whether good or bad, stem from what they see outside of school and, more importantly, what their home lives teach them. From what I can tell, we have a society of children, adolescents, and adults that need to listen to a little bit more Aretha Franklin. Maybe on repeat.
Our pastor gave a sermon a few Sundays ago about resetting different things in our lives. One was our mouth. I definitely thought I was in trouble because, as the T-shirt says, I have the vocabulary of a well-educated cattle rancher. Some days bordering on sailor. However, the part that actually struck me was when she spoke about being reflective and careful of things we put out there in all aspects of our lives...including (cue ominous sound) social media.
Maybe it was the sermon, or the sheer volume of it I seem to be seeing now, but there sure is a lot of negativity popping up on my feeds lately, and the majority by adults. How can we (society, humans) expect our kids to learn respect of others when we do not show respect to others? How can we use spiteful and hateful speech toward those different than us, those we don't agree with, and those who conflict with our ideas...and expect the next generation not to follow suit, maybe even directed to us? Why do we continually try to fight conflict with conflict and darkness with darkness? Why must we get defensive instead of understanding?
We live in a society now where apparently everyone owes everyone something for merely existing or someone is constantly getting offended by something and looking for retaliation. We live in a world of conflict, where acts of kindness are seen as a rarity and the news rings more of hostility and depression than actual news. At the same time some parents "don't know what they can do" with little Timmy's attitude, little Timmy is running around with the newest phone, car, and whatever else little Timmy wants. Or better yet, Mr. and Mrs. Little Timmy are bad-mouthing everyone from his teacher to the President thinking that it won't trickle down into his ears and his brain.
People are, in some ways, are what they see and what they are taught.
We also live in a world of diversity and individualism. Everyone is entitled to their opinions and beliefs on religion, politics, and life in general. There is a way, though, to stand firm in these beliefs without the hostility and disrespect toward others. I don't know if many people nowadays have gotten the memo, but we can be civil and even friendly with people that have different opinions and even beliefs than us without faulting on our own. These social media platforms and the way we use our words can be used to express ourselves and what we hold true without downgrading others, especially those in authority. Instead, our society is filled with individuals who have found new ways to spread their negativity and agression to others, letting the venom seep through the tapping of their keyboard. And the best part? No immediate consequences or accountability.
I was thinking tonight about how, in my lifetime and especially in my time so far as a teacher, things have changed in the way students act. I hear so many of my students that are not even old enough for a driving permit with strong, argumentative, and sometimes belligerent opinions, especially about politics. They are not coming up with these all on their own. It is coming from their home and what they consume on social media and tv every day. Then I see some of that same belligerent nature in their responses to correction and any interaction with authority at school.
I know not everyone will agree with things going on in our country at any point and time, especially politically. I am not a naive hippie flower child that thinks the whole entire world will one day join hands and sing in harmony worthy of a Coke commercial. I know that shows like SNL have made decade-long success with pointing out the flaws in political figures, some of which have served great entertainment for me. There is a difference. There is a line, and there is a way to cross it. There is being unapologetic, and there's being disrespectful.
I have wondered many times this year what the future holds, and sometimes it makes me very nervous. There are many children and adults young and old that could do with a little (or a lot) more appreciation and accountability. A little more realization of what is really important, and what hills are actually worth dying on. There are many who need to do a little less screaming, and a little more self reflection.
So the next time I see a little Timmy or Tammy pitching a hissy fit because life isn't perfect or handed to them, or the next time I see a degrading social media post...I can just think of four words from a fellow strong, opinionated diva..."sock it to me."
