We'll Understand It All By and By.

The cattle pasture was calling. The crisp, fall air was whispering to me to come outside and enjoy it.  Around me, things that needed to be done. The reminants of a long day at work of doing my best and still feeling behind. Freshly cleaned floors and bathrooms and a sore shoulder. Dishes and laundry to be both washed and put away. Lessons to create only to be unappreciated and questioned.  Wedding plans to fret over.  Outside my window, a picturesque dusk setting and my trusty steed (the Polaris Ranger). My couch all of a sudden felt uncomfortable and my soul restless. I needed therapy. I needed peace and to quiet my mind.  I needed to get the hades out of there.

The cows were not up where I could see them from my deck, so I decided to go to them.  My favorite feeling of cool fall air rushed through my hair and lungs as I drove through the green pasture, gaining solice with each breath. It was a beautiful night to forget responsibilities. I might have been less than a mile's distance from my house, but it was enough. The cattle were eating and resting, and I turned off the engine and just sat. I watched the cattle as they did all their nightly rituals and slightly wished I could just stay with them. Maybe just sleep out in the pasture and not tell anyone where I was. As I sat there listening to the bugs and frogs holler and felt the cool night air, I realized something. I've heard a lot about "happy places" as somewhere where you are supposed to go in your mind when things get tough, but I think I was sitting in mine.  Away from screens, from pressure, from stress.  Just listening and watching the beauty of life and nature. Sure there were a few things that could have made it even better, but it was just so peacful, and a peaceful easy feeling is not something I have been familiar with lately. 

 This year has brought about many things and, I'll be honest, lately not all have been positive.  My job is not what I would call a happy place right now, teaching is particularly stressful.  Wedding planning is getting down to the wire, and it seems like the last few weeks have peppered the big bowl of stress with bad news. Three Ws and an H have been running through my head a lot. Why. What. When. How. A lot of "How"s. But in the quiet, the good becomes clearer and the bad fades away. A few days ago I heard a song I have heard a hundred times through the melodious twang of Wade Bowen. One of my great grandpa's favorite songs, Farther Along.  I am reminded of it now. Over the horizon, there are good things ahead.  Simple things. Things to look forward to. Things to take comfort in. Things to enjoy. Things to appreciate. And the rest...I guess we'll understand it all by and by.