Resolutions
Resolutions. Something that people strive for in the new year and, the majority of the time, fall short. Famously around the globe, there are millions of jokes, memes, and social media posts made about resolutions that were made and put by the wayside.
As the Mad Hatter says, I have been considering things that begin with the letter M. In this case, it is "myself." In my sometimes whirlwind of a life, I usually spend the least amount of time in front of the mirror as possible. But sometimes, life hands you situations where you take an extended look at yourself. And, through that, are born blog posts.
Most years, I do not bother with resolutions and, if I am honest, the list I am about to diverge probably don't fall under the typical "resolutions."
1. Stop worrying. I know that everyone worries, and there are things in life that are worth worrying about. However, sometimes I catch myself worrying about things that should not be of any consequence. Not only do I sometimes worry about things of little consequence, but I spend too much time worrying over situations that I should have long let go. I am a self-proclaimed sometimes over-thinker, and I come by it honest. There are times when I can make split-second decisions, and may times where I am completely confident in my decisions and don't give it a second thought. But there are times when insecurity creeps in, and it seems to show its face at the most random of times. In that insecurity lies a spiral of over-analyzing, asking too many questions, and second-guessing. Sometimes it is born out of selfishness, and sometimes it is born out of concern of others. Either way, I am going to work toward just the right amount of worry, and about the right type of things.
2. Don't waste time with people. When I was younger (and I may have written about this before) my mother told me that I needed to watch out because not everyone had the same heart as me. This means that just because I would not act a certain way or do something to someone, does not mean that someone else won't, even if they call themselves my friend. Over the years, I have tried to keep this as a mantra and, on most occasions, I have conditioned myself quite well to recogize and respond accordingly. The problem is that those times that my conditioning fails me, it REALLY fails me. I am kind of like a Tootsie Roll Pop...if someone can get past my hard, crunchy exterior, I am all soft and gooey on the inside. Sometimes it does not take long for someone get to my Tootsie side, sometimes it take a while. But when they reach it, they are there. The problem is when people want to take a bite out of me. Lately, those types of people seem to be getting more and more decieving. One of my very favorite monologues by the great Tyler Perry is from the play version of Madea Goes to Jail. Madea talks about putting everyone in the category of a tree ( I may have also mentioned this before). Sometime I am fooled (and maybe we all are) into thinking people are going to be root people and instead they end up being leaves or branches. I am going to do better at my mindset on this. I need to change my thinking from being hurt by this, to just letting people be what they are. Instead of wasting more time and energy, more worry and frustration, just (as Madea puts it) let. folks. go. It may take unfollowing, unfriending, or some distance, but I want to do more pruning of my leaf and branch people and more appreciating and concentrating on my root people.
3. Take care of myself. This partially goes hand-in-hand with the above resolutions. I need to concentrate more on self-care. This could mean taking a nap, going for a walk, doing some retail therapy or just taking a minute to take a breath and relax. There are times when I have even felt guilty for taking a break or relaxing instead of doing tasks that lie undone. While tasks (home and job) are important, so is taking care of my mental, physical, and emotional well-being. It is okay to be non-productive, within reason of course. It is okay to change my mind. It is okay to cancel plans. It is okay to treat myself, within reason of course. It is okay to put myself first sometimes.