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Betrayal

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 Betrayal is a funny thing--and not in the "ha ha" way.  It comes in all kinds of forms--unkind words, stolen items, wavering loyalty, and even a catchy song in the well-known musical The Producers .  I have had betrayals throughout my life, but thankfully they have been fairly "mild" by most standards. I have not been captured by enemies, tied to a chair in some harshly-lit warehouse, only to find out that my best friend gave me away. I have not found out something nefarious about a partner which throws me unwittingly into a life of crime. I have not, to my knowledge, gotten close to someone only to find out their whole identitiy is a lie. No, my betrayals were not that cinematic. Some, even, took time and well-placed epiphanies for me to even discover they were, in fact, betrayals. For those like me that, despite evidence far to the contrary, still want to believe that the people they care about share the same desire to be there for their friends/family as they do...
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WHEN

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  When... One word. It plagues. It haunts. It knaws. So much power To make you feel inadequate To make you feel behind Like a damned white rabbit Frantically searching for the "next important date." I'm late...I'm late... The next birthday passes Still no pitter patter. "You aren't getting any younger." "You don't have forever." "You guys need to think about..." And then always the dreaded-- WHEN. Time is such a funny thing. We cannot control it. We cannot harness it. And we only get so much of it. So WHY do we want to depress And oppress others With our opinions on spending it. Why...
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Six Months

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Six months came and went Now I am sitting here at eight feeling sad guilty weighted The world kept spinning and I spun with it A whirlwind of distractions I tried to pick a focal point to keep from getting sick But the blurs kept spinning as I begged silently to just get off the ride. Six months came and went Now I am sitting at eight feeling tired emotional overwhelmed If I was not here If I took a cue from the old westerns you loved and rode off into the sunset with the credits rolling behind me How long until they just moved along? Six months came and went Now I am sitting at eight wondering how How the time has gone so fast How the vending machines can still work How much longer I will have to mindlessly trudge until the hurt stops
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